Confidence is a tricky thing. Not only might you aready suffer from low confidence, but it is something easily knocked. The slightest thing can throw you off balance and leave you feeling less than great about yourself. So, how can this be combatted? How can we bolster our confidence and improve it? Let’s take a look.

Believe in Yourself to Build Confidence

This can be the hardest thing to achieve. Many of us will hide how we really feel about ourselves, just going through the motions. Whether it is life experiences, the way you look, your position in life or the any number of other reasons that make you feel less than worthy, it can be combatted.

Believing in yourself is a challenge at times, but knowing who you are and loving that person brings that belief into focus. Even if you can’t think of a single thing you love about yourself, I imagine those around you can see wonderful things. Think about the compliments that you get, people generally don’t give them for no reason.

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A good way to help you find that belief is self-reflection. This means that you take an honest look at yourself, how you think and feel, as well as your reactions to situations. The you review that information. How could you change your reactions? Why do you feel you felt like that? What do you like and dislike about yourself? From this point you are able to start making small changes and appreciate the things you find you love about yourself. This builds not only the self-belief but self-confidence.

One way to start reflection, is through journaling. Exploring your day and what occurred. You’ll be surprised at how quickly you can see things in a different light and begin to understand yourself more.

Set Goals

Setting goals can be extremely rewarding. You have something to work towards, a purpose to move forward. The bonus is, when you achieve one of your goals it can give you a huge boost of confidence and belief in yourself.

The key is to start small, to pick goals that are manageable and realistic. Don’t begin with something that will take five years to achieve. Think about the immediate future, what do you want to change, gain or begin? Perhaps you want to start exercising more, improving your health. A few goas here could be to join a gym, find some online videos and follow them, or begin a new yoga class. Whatever you choose, ensure it is easily achievable. Then build on them, set bigger goals gradually.

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Photo by Zoltan Tasi on Unsplash

Remember, whilst boosting your confidence is one of the benefits of goal setting, don’t forget to reward yourself along the way. If you join a gym and go to classes four times a week, at the end of the week have a chocolate bar, takeaway or get yourself some new shoes. Write down your goals and what your reward will be. This encourages you to work towards it and adds to your confidence boost when you get there!

The Anchor or The Hammer?

Sometimes we lack confidence because of our experiences. It can be the case that we need to work through those experiences before we see much differenc ein our confidence. Of course there are many ways to achieve this, including seeking out professional help by way of a therapist. Take a look at our Therapy page for some ideas on where to look and ask for that help.

It can be helpful to take some time to think about what it is you feel could be holding you back. Then decide if you want it to continue to hold you back, or take those feelings and let them push you forward, breaking down those walls you’ve built around you. Do you want these feelings to be an anchor? Rooting you in place? Keeping you where you are? Or would you like to use those feelings as a hammer? Working through them, understanding them and yourself? Smashing those walls down and propelling you forward in confidence and self-belief?

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Photo by Lucas Sankey on Unsplash

There is a whole host of ways to build confidence, these are just a few mini starting points. We all have to start somewhere and are all at different parts of our journey’s. No matter what, remember that just getting started, making that decision to change things is a huge step. It is one to be proud of and shoud be the first boost you feel to your confidence.

You can find lots of information throughout The Wonderment about confidence, self-belief and self-worth.

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About Author

Erika is bright, bubbly and friendly. Studying to be a counsellor, she is committed to helping others in the pursuit of better mental health. Having suffered from mental health issues herself including severe anxiety and PTSD, she wants to show others that the light at the end of the tunnel is not just a cliché!
Erika enjoys spending time with her little one, friends and family, crafting, reading, writing, music gaming, cooking, creating art, cacti and llamas.

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